A Cyclops Who Likes Anime. A Shameful Cyclops

Hmmm what happens this episode…Sana has a cold and keeps blowing his nose and trying to toss them into his basket but missing (heh we’ve all been there the distribution of snot does not make for a very reliable center of gravity), and when he knocks over a box full of porn and Chiyo heads in to see porn all over and used tissues by the garbage can she freaks out and leaves. That wasn’t a bad gag. Mostly though it’s a serious episode about how Sana and Nanaka used to have a secret abandoned mailbox where they’d write each other letters. Of course they could have just handed their letters to each other but you know kids they have to create convoluted rituals to relieve the drudgery of their ordinary lives (be sure to ask me about how you can join the Grand Cyclops Society and all the brutal hazing it entails!). He remembers about this and goes to it to check it out, only to have a veritable flood of letters come rushing out at him when he opens it. I mean we all knew it was coming but it’s still nifty.

Niftier still (see what I did there) is the one that’s on top that says in scrawled red writing HELP ME over and over again, that’s the kind of chill down your spine you usually can only get from an episode of Higurashi. Sana finally learns Nanaka’s story, which isn’t really that big of a deal I don’t know why everyone’s been tiptoeing around that shit forever. Anyway he calls Nanaka out to the mailbox and she breaks down and starts yelling about how he wasn’t there when he needed her, yeah sorry next time he’ll tell his parents he can’t move with them there’s a little girl he knows who likes him sorry mom and dad we can’t move after all find a new job GOD WOMEN ARE SO UNREASONABLE! So things seem to be smoothed out between em.

Oh, and there’s some other shit; while Shuuji is telling Sana the story of Nanaka’s past he does probably the most hilarious overacting in an anime I’ve seen (not so much the vocal delivery but the animation it’s like an after school special lol). Sana later learns about the teacher’s history and why she gives out caramel and she might realize that he’s the kid from back then but maybe not I don’t fukken know.

BOTTOM LINE: It’s cool that we finally figured out what happened to Nanaka (although I think almost everyone pieced most of it together beforehand) and it’ll be interesting to see where it goes from here, hopefully she’ll stop being a pissy bitch on a perpetual period.

What the hell let’s give her some screenshots since she’ll be dead soon.

Things continue in the wacky vein for a decent amount of time, but then things start heading downhill as fewer and fewer people remember Fuuko (or even see her). Which seems to greatly disturb the people who knew her fairly well, because they feel like they should be remembering but they just can’t. Even Sunohara, who comes as close as anyone does to remembering her, can’t quite make the connection, which is very depressing for everyone. On the other hand, Fuuko finally warms up to Okazaki and admits that he’s really not a bad guy at all. Because of course if there was any tension (despite how obviously fake it was) before the girl died, which we all know she will (or disappear or some shit) then I guess they wouldn’t be able to work that. On the other hand, Fuuko finally learns that when she goes into one of her dazes she needs to immediately protect herself from Okazaki’s pranks.

So it ends on a very somber note where Nagisa’s parents are unable to see Fuuko; her dad just completely forgot about her, but her Mom remembers but realizes she’s forgetting and says that she’s welcome to stay in their house as long as she wants. Of course they don’t because that would just be depressing but it’s nice that she offered to let an invisible ghost character hang there.

BOttom Line: Remind me that I have a huge rant to go into for next episode unless things turn out quite differently from the way I expect them to. Although I’ll give you a hint: they never turn out differently. But on this episode, sure, it’s great. You feel bad that Fuuko’s going to be dead soon through the same story mechanic used in Kanon; even though the characters that are disappearing aren’t very important, by focusing a large % of the early episodes on them we become EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED (theoretically of course) and become invested in them. Despite them being bit players overall. Because I mean, Fuuko, what has she done so far? The story’s been about her and through her interactions we’ve gotten to know the other members of the cast better but in the larger scheme of things she pretty much means dick.

I’m just saying.

ALL SUNOHARA EPISODE WOOOOO

I wrote up a fairly long summary of this episode but then ppr crashed and didn’t save anything so fuck that FUCK IT I’M NOT NO I’M NOT YOU CAN JUST GO SOMEWHERE ELSE IF YOU WANT A SUMMARY

BOTTOM LINE: I HAD A STAR TREK METAPHOR AND EVERYTHING BUT NOPE NOPE THIS IS WHAT YOU GET

Big episode not huge explosion big but fairly big as far as the story goes. It’s graduation, which means the old guard - fat guy, fatter guy with a speech impediment, and Madarame - are saying goodbye to the Genshiken gang. They’ve all found jobs, although when asked where his job is Madarame points in a direction and says “about ten minutes that way,” and coupled with his appearence at the end of the episode eating his lunch in the room it’s safe to say he’s not going anywhere. Which is awesome since he’s the best character.

Then there’s Oono, who’s sad that she won’t be able to graduate with the second years since she’s a few credits short (she transferred), but cheers up when Sasahara makes her the new chairman. And she’s going to turn it into a cosplaying club. Well there goes years of tradition down the toilet it sure is a great idea to let women have positions of power OH CALM DOWN IT’S A JOKE GODDAMN!

Little things happen but I’m not gonna spoil em so f u

BOTTOM LINE: Not even disturbing at all so far better than the past few episodes!

A whole bunch of little things happen in this episode, surrounding the main event of the Movie Resarch Club starting to bring their original (undoubtedly shitty) composition to life. While they search for a main heroine, a lot of shit happens. Kazuki is still doing his really fucking dumb experiments with that genius girl, who has absolutely terrible taste. Honey and mayonnaise on potato chips? That’s even more disgusting than the usual Japanese taste combinations. That guy Mao is seeing gets all jealous because she’s been spending time with her dude friends at the movie club and makes a move on her, but she pushes him away who knows where that’s going to lead?!? Then they finally drag a girl in to be the heroine, the rich girl, but she can’t play any romantic leads but she’s willing to help on everything else. So at the end really nothing is advanced with the movie but a lot of little things have happened which adds up to a decent episode.

BOTTOM LINE: Pretty great episode of Kimikiss of course that doesn’t mean it’s a great episode of anime but you take em if you got em.

Makoto is still pretending to be a girl so he can hang out at the Minami household. Many issues are brought up: following suspicious old men that offer you money, how to tell who is suspicious and who isn’t (causing that guy from the earlier episode who always stops by to be held down by Chiaki’s friends until they can verify that yes, he is in fact their cousin), the soccer guy unwillingly inheriting the school’s title of Banshou (which was originally held by Haruka due to many many misunderstandings), and the continuing adventures of Sensei and Ninomiya-kun (where Ninomiya was hit by a car and developed amnesia, then while wandering outside Sensei attempted to save her and got hit by a car and developed amnesia, then they were both wandering outside and when the doctor tried to prevent a car from hitting them they both got hit by a car again). An all-around wacky ass episode.

BOTTOM LINE: Quite decent. No major plot advancements but with a show like this that’s fine if the wacky meaningless antics are sufficiently amusing (and they are). I wish they’d turn that soap opera into a full show I’d watch the fuck out of it

I mean honestly it’s not even really noteworthy enough for me to mention here, and when you think of all the absolute garbage I’ve written it’s saying something. But somehow it’s so bad that it hurtles backwards through triviality and ends up back at “fairly noteworthy” (it shot right through the layers above that as well, almost making 3 complete circuits).

What can I say? It really is one of the most disturbing things I’ve heard of in quite some time. I will say, however, it will most likely be less boring than the anime its based on since there has to be less dialog. I mean, there has to be right?

FINAL EPISODE YOU GUYS! As such I really don’t have to mention much if I need to pick it out at a later time; the gremlin guy turns super-powerful, Dante almost dies, some shit happens, fighting ensues, everything’s happy at the end. Even Patty comes back at the end, which is good because you wouldn’t want her to leave. Even if she does fulfill the scrappy youngster archetype a little too fully.

BOTTOM LINE: Could there have been more fighting? Yeah, definitely. I wish there was; most of it is Trish and Lady fighting against nameless badguys. But Dante gets to be a badass (as expected) even though it’s over waaaaaay too fast. Although he does use Devil Trigger so I guess it wasn’t a total loss. Overall I’d rate it as an above-average finale since it didn’t leave any major threads hanging and it didn’t pull some deus ex machina bullshit at the end where they all turn into rats or the world is a giant existential pie.

Best episode of Lucky Star yet. Coincidentally, the last ‘best episode’ of Lucky Star was when the Shounen Shop Owner appeared and hell yeah here he comes again to rock the day out. It seems like every character that’s not essential to the storyline - like that guy, his fellow shop worker, Akira and that other guy everyone calls Sebastian - are far, far more amusing than any of the main characters. Who fucking suck. I have to believe that’s the fault of the original mangaka and the anime team is merely doing a faithful translation of the manga to anime format. Which is sad, because clearly the writers are otherwise very talented and capable of crafting amusing scenes.

Anyway so when I say best episode don’t go thinking hey this is a laugh riot from start to finish. This is Lucky Star, buddy, and even a very good episode of LS requires you to sit through dozens of minutes of painfully trite dialog and a meandering ’story’ that sometimes seems as if it is actually going backwards (along with the clock).

What’s to love? Well, Kagami and her sister go to Comic Market with Kana. There’s Souske + Gauron doujinshi, hour-long lines to use the restroom (it truly bothers me that there are so many women at the event), and the hilarious Akira presence (which is just a cardboard sign which someone quickly knocks over, and when it’s picked up is folded in half and doesn’t show anything above the waist). The fact that every non-integral woman in the series is voiced by the same old-lady regardless of age is fucking lol too. The best part, thought, has to be when Souske’s VA (playing the Shounen Shop Owner) disparages a fellow employee working the Comiket store, voiced by Kyon’s VA. They start trying to convince a customer to buy left-over goods, and Kyon’s guy pulls out an unsold Kyon card and Souske’s guy pulls out an unsold Souske card and then they start arguing with their President about how they’re both the main characters of their series it’s pretty fucking great.

BOTTOM LINE: One of what, two or three episodes of this series so far that might be actually worth watching in certain circumstances (like if your arms fell off and you just started the episode and you can’t turn it off).

This episode is just off the wall fucking wackiness featuring Nabeshin, director (and character) of Excel Saga and Puni Puni Poemi and Yamato Nadeshiko and some other shit. While I do appreciate his wackiness - I do - it’s just a little too random for me. I mean I’m glad he was in it and it’s amusing and entertaining but it is really just a vehicle to showcase how crazy he is (and his family), and bring along some old Excel/Poemi characters for old time’s sake.

So Nabeshin shows up as a butler to do battle with Hayate, eats some free food with his family, and writes a bunch of anime scripts. And engages in some general wackiness. There’s a later storyline about Sakuya and Isumi trying to defeat a supernatural manifestation of Fish Herpes, which is pretty good because Sakuya is the best character, but other than that nothing special.

BOTTOM LINE: Not a bad episode of Hayate. You may have noticed that Hayate updates are slowing down quite a bit, and there’s a good reason for that. It’s…it’s just too long.

If it was still following the manga (which it very well could be if it wanted to) then I would be much more forgiving, but now they’re just throwing wacky ass situations in at random to extend the length as long as they can. And quite honestly Hayate feels spread a little too thin. Sure it’s always been off-the-wall and crazy but there’s always been a cohesive element there that drives things along. I’m not quite sure the characters can stand up to a prolonged period of “let’s just do whatever the hell we want to fill forty episodes.” Which is a shame, because I really like Hayate the manga and I enjoyed the anime series a fair amount, but if it keeps dragging along like this…I’m not sure man. I AM NOT SURE.